Gay men marry straight women
A gay man and a straight woman got married. They say it's not a 'lavender marriage' but founded on 'true pure love.'
Growing up gay and without examples of achieving marriages in his family, Jacob Hoff didn't assume he'd ever get married — let alone to a woman.
But in November last year, Hoff, 31, married his longtime girlfriend, Samantha Wynn Greenstone, 37.
When Business Insider spoke to the LA-based couple in 2023, they explained that they were in a "mixed-orientation" relationship, meaning that they have different sexual orientations. Hoff is a gay man, and Greenstone is a straight woman.
The two musical theatre performers started off as foremost friends, but started internet dating in 2017 when Greenstone admitted that she had romantic feelings for Hoff and he realized he felt the same way.
They've now been together for eight years in a monogamous relationship, and decided to tie the knot last year.
BI caught up with them to seek about their wedding, future plans, and whether the way others see them has changed.
Hoff and Greenstone put their own 'campy' stamp on wedding traditions
After so long together, getting married seemed like the natural next s
An Introduction
My client sat in the chair looking down at the floor, glancing up briefly to craft eye contact, then darting his eyes back to the carpet. He spoke quietly, as if almost afraid to be heard. He clutched his hands throughout the session, showing all the markers of an anxious man in the throes of shame. He was a fresh client to my practice: a married, middle-aged, suburban dad with a high-powered career. A colleague had given him my number months before. It took him a long age to muster the courage to call and form an appointment. Towards the end of our first session he looked up at me and said, “I think I’m in love…with another man. I’m scared and I don’t know what to do.”
I have worked with hundreds of gay men in heterosexual marriages struggling with being in the closet or wanting to appear from it. There is so much about these men that is misunderstood and very few studies or little literature to provide insight. I decided to share my thoughts and research about these men and their struggles at a conference a few years ago. That presentation led to other opportunities to tell their story and of my work with them. Those presentations prompted men to write to
I’m a Straight Woman Who Married a Gay Man
To get advice from Prudie, submit your questions anonymously here. (Questions may be lightly edited for publication.) Join the live chat every Monday at noon (and submit your comments) here, or call the Dear Prudence podcast voicemail at 401-371-3327 to overhear your question answered on a future episode of the show.
Dear Prudence,
I met my husband 13 years ago, and we’ve been together ever since. We fell deeply, madly in love with each other and have been married for nine wonderful years now. He’s patient, gentle, gentle-hearted. He’s also always been honest about entity gay and has never hidden it from me. Only one of our mutual friends knows this about my husband. Our son also knows, since we thought it would be best to last open with him about it, so he never “found out” by surprise or from our shared friend. Our son took the news very adequately and doesn’t care that his father was gay.
I’ve never told my family, or really any of my friends, as I think they’d all be judgmental. My siblings don’t like my husband, but that’s a different letter in itself. So I’ve always kept it bottled up inside. He’s been married before, and div
Asarchaicas it might sound, even with all the media hype, touting celebratory strides forward for LGBTQ rights, there's still a stained little societal secret getting brushed under the rug... gay men, in droves, are still being forced, shamed, and belief-poisoned to do the right thing -- marry heterosexual women even though they (the men) know they're queer .
Now, before you glass house dwellers start throwing your vicious verbal and judgmental assaults, I encourage you to swear on a stack of Bible's that you've stood in a gay man's shoes, pummeled emotionally and intellectually by family, church, and society's pressure to be the heterosexual marrying caring. Yes, stand in his shoes and make sure they fit perfectly love Cinderella's glass slipper, before you open your condescending, wicked stepsister, sneering mouth.
If you haven't lived and breathed sexual orientation confusion, felt gay shame, or laid awake at night wishing that you really could pray the gay away, then honestly, you've nothing to contribute to this discussion and everything to learn from reading further as to why some gay men take the road of heterosexual matrimony instead of embracing the truth of who they are
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