When I got married nearly three years ago, at the wedding reception I asked some of the older and wiser folks who were attending for a few words of advice from their control relationships to make sure my wife and I didn’t shit the (same) bed. I think a lot of newlyweds undertake this—ask for relationship guide, I mean, not shit the same bed—especially after a few cocktails from the open bar they just paid for.
But then I figured that with access to hundreds of thousands of smart, astonishing people through my website, I could go one step further. Why not consult my readers? Why not ask them for their best relationship/marriage advice? Why not synthesize all of their wisdom and experience into something straightforward and applicable to any relationship, no matter who you are?
Why not crowdsource THE ULTIMATE RELATIONSHIP Reference TO END ALL Partnership GUIDES™ from the sea of smart and savvy partners and lovers who come to markmanson.net?
This is what I asked: anyone who has been married for 10+ years, and is still happy in their relationship . . . what lessons would you pass down to others if you could? What is working for you and your partner? Also, to people who ar
~ JenniferP
"Is it technically cheating?" vs. "Even if the answer is no, is this the compassionate of relationship you want?"
~ elodieunderglass ~
Season's felicitations, Awkward Army! Elodie Under Glass here with two letters about accommodating your loved ones during stressful celebrations. Goodness, could this be a TIMELY POST? Here's Letter #1. Cherished Captain, I own a weird situation going with my dad. There's a lot of history here so I'll experiment to be brief. … Continue reading #649 and #650: Making Room for the Ones You Desire (Is How They Perceive You Love Them)
~ Dianna ~
[Content note: purity culture] Dear Captain Awkward, I am married. My husband is a very lovely, supportive man, very devoted and considerate, and a great father to our small child. We've been together nearly a decade, and married for most of that occasion. We are a fine partnership. He was the first person I ever … Continue reading Guest Post #496: I No Longer Have Pantsfeelings for the Only Partner I’ve Had
~ JenniferP ~
Dear Captain Awkward, It was perhaps my hookup starved, commitment-phobe, idealistic and naïve side that encouraged me to start a Companion
Relationship Advice from 500 Years
My wife and I noted our 7th anniversary on December 17th.
As I brainstormed ideas for something unusual that I could form for us for the occasion, I kept coming back to the most fundamental reality: Time.
We contain been married for seven years, but it's transparent to me that the passage of time has accelerated since the birth of our son in May 2022. The last 18 months have simply flown by. As I so often repeat, the days are long but the years are short.
So to create something one-of-a-kind and memorable for this year's anniversary, I decided I would explore a bit of the association wisdom that time provides.
To do so, I asked couples who have been married 40, 50, or 60+ years a easy question:
What relationship advice would you give to your younger selves?
The participants ranged from a mid-60s couple who had just famous their 40th anniversary to a 99-year-old who had just celebrated 66 years of happiness with his bride.
In total, the suggestion captured 500+ years of earned wisdom from these beautiful relationships.
Here's the connection advice everyone needs to hear...
1. Tell your loved one you love them every night b
Whenever the topic of relationships comes up—whether familial, friendships, romantic, or work—my ears perk up. Why? I’m fascinated by how people communicate, navigate conflict, put boundaries, express love, and everything in between. It’s complex and it’s subjective. Being human can be so messy and lovely that talking about it always provides another way for me to encounter life. And because of that, perspectives on association advice can differ widely.
So you can imagine my joy when I ended up at an impromptu dinner last month and sat next to a newly-married friend. She joint their origin story and the lessons she’s already learned a few months into marriage. That conversation sparked a table-wide, fully-engaged convo about relationships.
Featured image by Kristen Kilpatrick.
Everyone at the table was either married or dating, and the length of these relationships spanned as prior as six months to over 10 years. As the newly coupled-up one amongst the group, my curious mind couldn’t position still, and I had a million questions for everyone. The first one being, “what’s one of your favorite things about your partner?” Was it an excuse to distribute my own favorite th